I'm Dreaming Of A Bland Christmas

Black Christmas: A Review

To start you all off I love the original 1974 Black Christmas. It was genuinely creepy and made good use of keeping the viewer in suspense without dragging it out. To date it is one of my favorite horror films. However the remake is living proof that "If it ain't broke don't fix it" To sum it up the movie deviates too far from it's original source and it shows.

The remake doubles the cast members ensuring that we get more bodies to brutally murder. Unfortunately the characters are so unmemorable that the viewers neither cures nor remembers who is who. Rather than follow the original in keeping the killer's background/motives unknown we are treated to a lame ass back story full of murder incest and eye-gouging galore. As for acting we have the talents of Michelle Tractenberg and Lacey Chabert absolutely wasted in one note roles. Most of the supporting actresses are boring and unmemorable save for Crystal Lowe who actually makes her role worth while to watch.

And the eye-gouging, good lord, it was unpleasant enough the first time around and did not need to be repeated. The original had subplots that garnered interest, a father searching for his daughter, a relationship gone sour. Instead we get back stories about characters that die ten minutes into the film. What is the point?


Then of course the surprise ending with we could see it from a mile away plot twist to the just when you thought it was over oh my god here he comes ending trust me if you want true horror rent the '74 version if you want to be bored senseless and pissed off grab the remake.

black christmas

Unaffected By The Butterfly Effect 2

Lord What Fools These Sequel Makers Be
SPOILERS!!!!


To those of you who don't know me, I adore the Butterfly Effect. It's one my favorite films and would slip into a Top 20 list with ease. The Butterfly Effect 2 is a direct to video film released last October, it has none of the original cast and sadly none of the original charm.

To start things off the lead character Nick is straight out unlikable. He is able to travel back to the past via a photograph in order to prevent a automobile accident that claims the life of his girlfriend, Julie and his best friends. In the original Butterfly Effect the character Evan also goes back through time to save the woman he loves and help his friends out. In one timeline he is a paraplegic and his love is dating his best friend. Seeing how happy that they all are he opts to commit suicide rather than go back and tweak time. Nick despite his friends being alive and well tweaks the past to snag a VP position at his work ruining the happy life he had been in.

In the VP timeline he has sex with another woman before even trying to confirm if he is still with Julie. When his best friend (whom he previously time traveled to save) is in trouble he seems to care even less

Other problems I had with this film were the sex scenes, now I'm not prude by any means of the word. But if you are barely piecing together a coherent movie wasting a near half hour with not one but two unneeded sex scenes are inadvisable. To top things off Erica Durance (saddled with the thankless role of Julie) comes off as wooden as best. A cringe worthy scene in the beginning has her letting out the fakest laugh I have ever heard in movie history. The actress seems bored by her role and is just trying to get through it as painlessly as possible.

And if the poor viewers weren't mistreated and or insulted enough we are rewarded with a lame, tacked on scene with us discovering that Nick's child gasp shares his gift. Ugh I'm going to a case of brain bleach to remove this from my memories.


Butterfly Effect 2