Return To The House On Haunted Hill

Simply awful and boring. This sequel takes place 8 years after the events in the first (and far more superior) film. Ariel Wolfe (Amanda Righetti) is stunned to learn of her estranged sister Sara (not played by the lovely Ali Larter) has taken her life. The murders of the previous film had been blamed on Steven Price and no believed Sara's insistence that it was the act of ghosts.

Ariel meets archaeologist Richard Hammer who insists that Sara was planning to go back to the house to find a priceless idol. Ariel doesn't believe him until she finds a journal that her sister mailed her prior to her death. However Ariel and her boyfriend are kidnapped by evil archaeologist Desmond (Erik Palladino)and taken to the house. Richard, his lover, and his assistant are also in the house looking for the idol. The house wakes up and wackiness ensues.

While the deaths were creative, the characters are too boring to root for. This film lacks the suspense of the first one as well as the creative casting. The idol storyline seems forced and really brings to movie down. The ending was predictable as hell complete with the tacked on ending threatening the viewers with another sequel.

A major annoyance is that they do not even hint at what had happened to Eddie Baker (Taye Diggs) who had also survived the film alongside Sarah. It's called continuity people.

The Reaping

As far as religious end of the world films go this one is pretty good. It stars the always fetching Hilary Swank as Katherine Winter. Katherine is a former minister who lost her faith after the slaughter of her family.

Now a debunker of miracles she and her assistant Ben are called to the small town of Haven, Louisiana after the river begins to run red with blood. The blame falls on a strange girl named Loren (AnnaSophia Robb) whose brother mysteriously died at the exact moment the rivers turned. Now Katherine has to deal with her faith or there lack of in order to find out the truth.

This is a fun, suspenseful film that has great character development and great use of atmosphere. Hilary Swank is wonderful and AnnaSophia Robb (best known for her role as Violet Beauregarde in Charlie and The Chocolate Factory) is haunting in her role as Loren.

While hampered with a slightly predictable ending it's a great film to watch if you are in a suspenseful mood.

Whisper

Whisper is hands down one of the better horror/suspense films I have seen in awhile. It stars Josh Holloway (Lost) and Sarah Wayne Callies (Prison Break) with a great performance from Blake Woodruff (Cheaper By The Dozen 1 & 2)

Holloway plays ex-convict Max Truemont who just wants to settle down and go legit. His dreams of owning his own diner go up in smoke after his felonious past interferes with his getting a loan. Max eventually agrees to kidnap a young boy and hold him for ransom. Along with his reluctant girlfriend Roxanne (Callies), Vince, and and ringleader Sydney they keep the boy David (Woodruff) in an isolated cabin.

However there is more to David than meets the eyes. And soon he begins to play on their emotions and slowly turns them against each other. This movie in a word awesome, it doesn't insult the viewer and actually is a great and original story. The actors really embody their roles making you actually care what happens to them what happens to them. Woodruff is wonderfully creepy while Holloway proves he can carry a movie.

Resident Evil: Extinction

I have to go right out and say it I hated Resident Evil: Apocalypse. I found it boring, over convoluted, and a seemingly tacked on ending. What made it all the more offensive was that I adored the first Resident Evil.

When I heard there was a three I faced it with mild trepidation. It could be a great movie that totally makes up for the Apocalypse or it could bomb royally making me regret shelling out the money to see it. Thankfully it was the latter.

The movie's plot borrows a lot from the video game Resident Evil: Code Veronica. It has been 8 years since the last film (though at one point it is stated as only 5). The T-Virus has spread all over the world turning the planet into a desert wasteland. Alice is now on her own trying to hide from The Umbrella Corporation who is tracking her every move. Meanwhile Dr Sam Isaacs is cloning Alice in the hopes of finding a cure for the T-Virus. The casting is top-notch Milla Jovovich is as awesome as always, Oded Fehr and Mike Epps return to their roles from the previous sequel. New characters include singer Ashanti as Nurse Betty, the always wonderful Ali Larter as Claire Redfield, and a great debut by unknown Spencer Locke who plats K-Mart.

The movie is action-packed, fun, and definitely a good movie to see. It has a cliffhanger ending that actually makes you yearn for a Resident Evil 4. My only quibble has to do with the whereabouts of Jill Valentine and Angela Ashford who not mentioned at all in the movie despite the returns of L.T. and Carlos.

But all in all it is a movie I heartedly recommend.

Night Of The Living Dead 3D

This movie wasn't bad by any major standards it just seemed unnecessary to me. While it contained a lot of homage and inside jokes to George Romero's 1967 classic film but it still just lacks any spark. The plot is similar to the original, siblings Johnny and Barbara (called Barb in this version) head off to a cemetery when they are plagued by zombies. Barb eventually winds up at a farm with Ben (played by a white guy instead of the usual black guy) Harry, Helen, and Karen are the owners of the farm as opposed to a family forced to hide their. Tom and Judy make an appearance but with none of the sweetness or romance usually seen between them.
Two new characters are added Owen (a stoner farm hand) and Gerald (played by the incomparable Sid Haig) a mortician with a dark secret.

Simply put this movie was just dull, things move by way too fast, and even the 3D effects that are the main draw of this film are simply uninteresting. Sadly even the most indiscriminate horror/zombie enthusiast will find anything worthwhile in this tepid remake.

Sadly with the original Night Of The Living Dead now in public domain there is no stopping people from remaking this film over and over with no respect for the original. For a good remake track down Tom Savini's 1990 remake, it stays true to the original with a few good changes to spruce it up a bit.

Spotlight On Slashers #1: The Slumber Party Massacre Trilogy

In my opinion, the slasher film is the best in cinematic junk food. There's no deep insight into the killer's psyche. No rhyme, no reason. Just blood, breasts, and senseless dialogue. There are some that vanish and never even make it to DVD while others stay popular after all these years. Slumber Party Massacre may not be one the popular ones but they are a must for any self-respecting horror fan.


Slumber Party Massacre: Few people know that this movie was never meant to be a serious slasher film. It was written by feminist author Rita Mae Brown as a parody of the slasher genre. But in typical Hollywood fashion it was taken seriously and filmed as such. Because of this the movie contains a lot of humorous moments both intentional and unintentional. The movie still contains everything a slasher fan loves and is more entertaining than a lot of the other films in this genre. Props for not shedding any real light on why the killer did what he did or giving us some happy ending. The plot is typical. A group of young nubile girls fight a very uninvited guest during a slumber party.


Slumber Party Massacre 2: What The Fuck? I mean seriously what the fuck? I mean my standards for horror films are pretty low. There are a lot of movies I watch that will never fall under the self-respecting horror fan guidelines. And this movie still sucked. It stars former Wings star Crystal Bernard as Courtney one of the survivors of the massacre all grown up. She and the other members of her lame, Bangles-esque rock band are off to for a slumber party weekend. However Courtney is haunted by dreams of a punk rock driller killer and pleas from her institulaized sister Val (another survivor of SPM 1) not to have sex. She should have pled with the viewers not to watch this crap. For a slasher movie it waits an hour before giving us any kills. Instead we sit through an hour of Courtney's visions, her friend's head turns into a pimple and a mutant chicken attacks her. When the kills finally come viewers have pretty much lost interest and the ending is confusing and dull.

Slumber Party Massacre 3: Interesting enough this was not initially filmed as a SPM sequel but the title was changed in order to squeeze out some more juice from the series. Ironically it is a truer sequel to SPM 1 than it's confusing counterpart. The plot goes back to basics the nubile teens, the weird red herring characters, and blood, gore and sex galore. It seems to regain some of the humor of the original as well However if anyone reading this wants to view the trailers on Youtube or elsewhere, DON'T view the trailer for this one. For some inexplicable reason the trailer tells you outright who the killer is.

Cheerleader Massacre (a.k.a. Slumber Party Massacre 4): I'm putting this in here to save space for my review of this movie once I locate it. Filmed 13 years after SPM 3 it stars Brinke Stevens who reprises her role of Linda whom she played in SPM 1.

This trilogy has one more interesting fact about it, all three films were written and directed by women. A rarity in the often male-dominated world of horror.

Halloween 2007

Rob Zombie has done the impossible, he's taken a long dormant, steadily decreasing horror series and given it new life in this remake of the 1978 classic. However he puts his own spin on the story by giving us something that no Halloween film has done before, he gives us a look inside Michael Myers. No longer a silent menace quietly depleting the population of Haddonfield, Illinois we see a more human aspect to him and strangely some sympathy.

The movie is awesome it says true to the movie but also adds his own spin on the events. It has great casting, a perfect soundtrack, and a great blend of storytelling and bloodshed.

The cast includes Malcolm McDowell doing a fantastic job filling Donald Pleasence's shoes as Michael friend/nemesis Dr. Loomis. Sherri Moon Zombie shines as Michael's mother and proves that she's capable of versatile roles. And newcomer Daeg Faerch is mesmerizing as a young Michael Myers.

Even the secondary cast is awesome with cameos by horror veterans such as Danny Trejo and Ken Foree and Clint Howard. And the much welcome return of Danielle Harris is a treat for all Halloween fans. For you non fans, Danielle Harris appeared in Halloween 4 & 5 as Laurie Strode's orphaned daughter Jamie. Despite her popularity with Halloween fans she was passed over not only for Halloween 6 but was also retconned out of the series with Halloween H20.

The only dark spot in the casting has to do with the character of Laurie Strode, Michael's younger sister. This Laurie played by Scout Taylor-Compton does not hold a candle to the role originated by Jamie Lee Curtis. Her Laurie has none of the innocence and vulnerability as the original. Instead she comes off nearly manic and becomes annoying the longer she stays on screen

This movie is a treat for horror fans whether you are a newbie to the series or a purist you will enjoy it.